Gorillabuns

plain white T's

A friend of mine asked me to help her out with camp shirts for her kids this week. As always I am totally up to the challenge even if I'm ill equipped with the software to do so.

I designed the K's in WORD! For the love of GOD! I will be so glad to get my copy of Illustrater next week.... and printed the text on transfer paper. Word to the wise, remember to reverse your image if the directions call you to do so (this means actually READ the directions on the carton of paper) or you'll will get this.

A reversed "K" on your pillow case.

All in all, I think they turned out okay.  I especially like the payment of cash and Vodka! 

WILL WORK FOR VODKA!

Man, my friend knows how to treat me right.

This idea transcended itself into the craft of the week for the girls:

Making personalized t-shirts for the summer.

Go to *shudder* Walmart and get a cheap $2.97 t-shirt, scour the internet and download the picture (inser Monster High obsession into the equation) in Word, Illustrator, Paint or Photoshop. Add text to personalize it even more if you are into getting crazy.

PAY ATTENTION! to the directions and iron the decal on your kids shirt and VIOLA! You now have a shirt they are happy to wear and you won't freak out when they drop spaghetti sauce or globs of paint on it.

If you are lucky enough, the over-exposure to their fanatisicm will die out quicker than the actual shirt and decal.

My bliss moment of the week:

They can be so sweet and loving with each other.

storms

 

Storm rolling in from Tuesday evening.

Protecting fragile life from hell.

Hiding out in the storm shelter.

Good times.

Let's forget about my now hidden post from Sunday.  If you were lucky to read it just know, I still/he still feels the same way. Yet, to be fair, I shouldn't vomit this portion of my marriage out there. Or maybe, I took it down because I'm ashamed of how I am made to feel.

In truth there are so many storms circulating around us these days. Personal, familial, mate-dom, LIFE - I can hardly breathe.

I would really like to be a kid again and have someone else take care of it all for me. To only worry about playing and not responsible for shit.

Wouldn't that be nice? for all of us?

 

 

day one of summer break

Okay. So it was not all sunshine and rainbows with regards to my children being home for their summer vacation starting like, yesterday.

I have to set the record straight. I love them. I want them around but Good Lord! I do want to sleep in longer than the 10 minutes later than school day alarm clock. Celia who stayed up way too late last night was awake at 7:30am this morning. I really needed her to sleep in until at least 8am. Then I would know that this is the respectable hour for actual salaried workers. That is if I actually clocked in at an actual job.

Now I'm truly a day care worker. Coupled with I actually like the kids I'm watching.

I started out with mandated chocolate milk and Disney channel fare.

By 8:30, my ass was in the kitchen making french toast and bacon.

Knowing this was a do or die situation on the housekeeping home front, I used old birthday plates. You know, to be so eco-friendly and green.

Then, the other child woke up. It then became stage four def-con. We are now moving into "entertain you kids or your husband will lecture your ass all day long because they keep going into his office to discuss Monster High with him."

Sadly, he has forgotten that during certain times in our lives, people actually live in this household while he works.

So I tried to distract.

Suddenly, we've moved onto craft number two within three hours. My kitchen table is a wreck with glue and paint. Thankfully, I'm a lazy mom who really doesn't give a shit if there is glitter on her table and indelible markers on her child's skin.

When I asked for just a sweet minute to go have my morning constitutional, the make up and nail polish came out to play.

Even here, I didn't freak out. Because I had a few moments alone with my US magazine while perched on the loo.

After my 10 minute break, the girls cannibalized a shipping box that just came through for the youngest Monster High's doll to have a safe haven for 'club dancing.' Notice, they have now moved into the formal dining area, a.k.a. the only place that was left clean in the house.

Since I should have been given a medal for making a one made from scratch meal and well, since I hadn't cleaned up from that damn meal, we decided to get out of the house and have lunch at the nearest Chik fil-A.  Here we dined with 100 screaming kids with their equally annoying parents who ignored such screams of pain, joy and ecstasy.

When the girls finished their meal, Celia and Moira had a deep conversation about playing in the play area.

Moira:"Yea, we didn't bring socks."

Celia: "Gross! We just can't go and play in that area without socks!"

Moira: "Right! We don't want to get toe nail fungus!" 

THEY LISTEN TO ME!!!! AND ACTUALLY RETAIN MY WISE TEACHINGS!!!!

 

We then moved onto Super Target. Nothing says bliss than spending too much money and a shit-ton of time in this haven.

We did make it out with this cute t-shirt for the girls (#photoadaymay, Day:24: something new, in case you care.)

A Harajuku girl! "If I were a rich girl, nanananananananananananana!"

We returned home and I mandated nap time. Well, I took a nap. To hell with anyone else who didn't.

I awoke to the girl's playing with their Monster High dolls and learning how to apply make up from the computer. IN THEIR FATHER'S OFFICE! Holy Hanna! I just knew I was going to be in trouble. Somehow, my husband was MIA. I'm not sure where he disappeared off to though to be sure, he was quite justified in leaving.

After the fun that was no longer fun, we then made them become farm hands by watering the fields and feeding the cows. Or in truth, watering a few dying flowers and snipping the scapes off the almost ready for picking fresh garlic. Because we really like to act like we know what the hell we are doing over here in the Buns Gardening section of the day.

I did use three of these stalks with the mini bulb chopped up in my homemade taco salad for dinner. I have to admit since I've never seen these things or used them in anything, I was skeptical in their use. They tasted really good and not overpowering. One would say, subtle.  Next up, making a dressing for tonight's salad or as I like to think, the healthy part of the dinner. Because I made it from scratch. Look at me playing like I'm all Mother Earth. 

We wound down the evening with the much awaited and HIGHLY ANTICIPATED return of "SO, YOU THINK YOU CAN DANCE!"

This is the portion of the evening in which the girls passed out and Rich and I cried for a solid two hours over stories, dances, children, someone else's child and the pure magnitude and beauty of the human body. I have to say, we love this show as it seems to be so cathartic to our souls and psyche. Maybe because the stories of suicide, Autism, blindness and humility make us feel there is a little humanity left in this world. I simply can.not.wait until next week. This show is that damn good!  Or, we are that damn pathetic.

Let us pray that tomorrow will be a little more calm with a lot less action with the kidlets.