Gorillabuns

history of gorilla-hair during the early 90's

Look at this young couple.

The couple where one mate has donned on a peacock-patterned vest while the other one has rudely applied red lipstick rivaling "The Jokers" mask.

Here I'm dating a souped-up, New Kids on the Block, Joey McIntyre. One on a massive roids ride or chief entertainer of the "guns" show (just so you know, guns in the weight-lifting world would be biceps. Mr. McIntyre was a big fan of shooting a few rounds my direction for his enjoyment. I would clap with glee.)

Aw-ww.... what a cute, young couple. What a mating of the 90's.

Okay, so I threw in this stupid-ass pic to show others - LOOK AT HOW MOTHER-OF-PEARL SKINNY I USED TO BE!!!! I've told you I was thin! I know by looking at me today, you would never know it..... but I once was!

My diet at the time consisted of Boca burgers and heartbreak. I think the regimen totally worked for me.

WHOA! Look at all of the hair fighting for attention here and my bulbous nose.
 

Excuse the craptastic quality here. Too bad photography doesn't translate very well with crappy printers as well as photos shoved in acidic photo albums.

As you can see, I'm dating Jesus Christ, himself. He's surly and about to go off to fish with the fisherman of the sea. a.k.a. Alaska.

The second time.

and man, while his temperamental brooding b.s. of the time didn't quite entertain me too much, my older self finds this pic to be pretty exciting and hot. In a bad-boy kind of way. I've always liked me a good bad boy.
 

Finally....

Here: I'm dating Sammy Hagar. A way young, pre-Van Halen, Sammy, circa 1994 or 5.

There's that damn red lipstick again..... but man, I'd kill for this hair color again and baby-butt smooth skin.

Hell, I'd kill for the body I had in my 20's. The whole time I thought I was fat and didn't appreciate the tiny waist and small arms. I still had linebacker legs but they were more like junior leaguers than running backs.

As usual, there is ABSOLUTELY! no direction to this post other than my contemplative state of my mind, body, soul and lack of youth on my side.

I've had quite a bit of heartbreak as of late (and the weight isn't coming off) so maybe I should revert back to the Boca Burgers to be svelte again. or maybe quite shoving shit down my throat. and exercise. and get lippo. and go to fat camp.

Yea, that's the ticket. fat camp.

In a truly horrible and non-related segue: go and check this out. You just might be happy you did.

Now, do me a favor: go and find your old tube of blaring red lipstick and start scaring the shit of your children, neighbors and country men with your screaming siren red lips as I plan on doing so tomorrow. Maybe no one will notice my ass due to my honking lips.  It's worth a try.

  

grey

 

I've worked quite a bit as a fill in Secretary as well as a sub for art in the kidlet's school this past week.  I haven't had time to read and comment on other people's coming and goings, go to the grocery store, do laundry or watch all of the late night Big Brother 12 "After Hours" happenings.  I'm quite sad about the last statement most of all. The girls have enough underwear to last them through next month but Big Brother? I'm hoping and praying something interesting is going to happen but let's face it: This season is totally boring. and I don't want to miss anything that might be interesting.

Bring back Jeff and Jordan! A show only about them! 24/7 live feeds of useless bullshit! Screw boring crotch grabbers and their boring chatter! I want me some entertainment!

Speaking of crotch grabbing and boring chatter....

I've substituted at the school this week as the resident fill-in Art Teacher. As a teacher who doesn't know when her classes are as they are mis-scheduled by the original art teacher who has misprinted and misrepresented them at every turn. (Kinda like he wants to forget he actually has to hold a class or two in return for his money.....)

I'm going to go out on a limb here and state:  Education in this area at this school, sucks major ass. The children aren't challenged. The art is graded on, GOD KNOWS WHAT! not content, application of self and self-discovery. The kids are given such bullshit scenarios and are asked to yet, draw another picture of well... let's see... tennis shoes raining on us? humans as animals? Yea, I'm not getting it either and you can guaran-damn-T, the kids aren't getting it as well.

Screw fundamentals, screw the history of a statement from a particular artist, artistic style/interpretation, SCREW APPRECIATING ART AND IT'S HISTORY!

Can you figure out, I'm quite disappointed, jaded and well.....angry about the school's art program? I think all children should have the chance to be exposed to art in a positive light. This is the time in our children's lives when you contemplate, reason and express your feelings about the subject matter at hand not berated for speaking, moving or breathing. I think the gift of passion and a positive feel for art should be taught to our children. Even if they are not-as-talented as their neighbor.

To me, Art is the expression of your feelings. Not just the line or stroke but the individual hand creating something from one's own personal objective and experience.

This feeling? Would not make me a great teacher. OR so I gather... from the current licensed professional.

I have to say after projecting the given lesson plan at hand for the past few days, I feel like my kids have been given the short end of the stick in this department. I'm quite sure Art as a whole has been reduced to a time-filler if not, eradicated all together in other schools.

If I hadn't been exposed to the fundamentals, positive influence as well as the freedom of expression at an earlier age, I would be a drone of non-creativity.

Incapable of original thought and isn't original thought what separates us from animals? No?

No, WAIT! You are supposed to draw them as our keepers, right? Okay, I'll give a half-point on this thought though and animal can be anything, anyone or any object. Not-so-literal.

The blah end result is what I fear for our children.

Quite simply, I feel they are headed full-fledged into an absence of magical thinking, imaginative problem-solving as well as black and white matter turning into a grey mass of blob-dom.

 or maybe, I'm over-thinking this subject matter and I should be like that of our leaders. We should have only one thought, one idea in which going against the grain is not acceptable. If so, you are considered to be wrong. You are an outcast. You are not a part of a group.

or maybe, this is Catholic school and I should accept the end result as it is.

How about you? Do you? Do you even care about this boring subject?

*yawn*

 

***since i TOTALLY LIVE FOR HALL MONITORS.... I have edited the photo in case some one else gets their panties in a wad over a picture of blurry eyes and super-effected backgrounds has been published. Surely, I'm saved from being sued over children whose parents who could give two rat's asses over their kid's backs being shown. If not? Sue me! I don't have any money to try and get.*** 

links of love

Yes, the Gorillabuns household started Second grade and Kindergarten respectively. The only person crying like a freaking spazzed-out baboon today was Mrs. Gorillabuns. The sight was something to behold. Truly. Sunglasses could not encapsulate the burgeoning dam breaking free. Sadly, Mrs. Gorillabuns felt like a fool in front of an old "flame" whose daughter happens to be in Moira's class. Mrs. Gorillabuns exclaimed with much vigor to him and anyone who would listen, "I have nothing to apologize for! This is my last child! In full-day Kindergarten! I'll act like I want with no apologies!"

Yea, it went over well especially when she had to go and work in the church office with swollen eyes, fabu water-eye baggies and monster shakes from double dosing her very delinquent Prozac Nation.

You can also see how "bunny" faced her fears here.  I only link because well, I didn't link so well last time when I discussed my short-term side-gig. Check-check-check it out! See, See, See, what it's all about...

Only if you wanna.

Ummm..... who is NOT a hard-core salesperson here?

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Want in on my new obsession? Well, the obsession itself isn't new but the site is.

I love this chick and man, after reading the first paragraph of her posts, I completely forget what show we are talking about. Kinda like when you go to the movies and you have 20 previews flashed before your eyes to only exclaim, "Now, what movie was I here to see?"

Or maybe, this condition is all me and I have the attention span that of a fruity fly. Yea, that's the ticket. I'm easily distracted.

What of it?

Now, what was I talking about?

Forget it. Carry on.